What is ‘nagging’, an embarrassing habit your partner can do to you and why you should avoid it

,perforator‘ is a communication problem in which one member of the couple asks and the other obeys. In fact, communication problems are one of the main reasons that lead to the failure of marriages, above all even infidelity.

command and obedience, the word haunting, which can be roughly translated as a scolding, a mixture of stubbornness And growling, always with a negative tone, has been widely used in the Anglo-Saxon world to name this specific type of communication problems in which one member of the relationship asks and the other obeys.

The word comes from the Scandinavian “nagga”, meaning “to nibble”, because of the psychological effects that occur in pairs when repeating the same thought over and over (“make the bed”, “call your sister”, “remember”). to pick up your baby later”) as a rat does with its food: slowly but relentlessly, the urge eats away at the cordiality of the relationship.

The ‘Nagars’ constantly criticize and make generalisations, they also create a vicious cycle of difficult exits in which both feel they are right. And in part there is this: The more you complain, the more likely your partner will ignore youWhich usually causes the anger of the former and the victim of the latter.

Another serious problem that, according to experts, can affect people’s self-esteem, is that the person being scolded has a feeling that they are doing everything wrong, and that That his partner is behaving like his father. many times, Nagar responds to a very specific psychological profile that leads him to constantly seek conflict.as confirmation.

In a text published in Psychoanalytic Review, he highlighted that the bully is usually straightforward, but also vulnerable, insecure, and fearful; The scolding usually admits his guilt and shows great self-restraint. However, when the slanderer meets someone who responds to criticism directly and firmly, it is likely that he or she will gradually begin to control themselves, blaming the other and calling them stupid or inferior. Feelings are attitudes that damage the relationship.

This type of behavior causes many negative emotions in which he receives so much criticism and constant scolding:

*Produces emotional exhaustion

* Lack of interest in being sexually and emotionally with a partner

*a crime that makes another feel bad

* Believing that he is really worthless or that he is a worthless person.

* It also makes you think “I’m not enough”, I’ll never approve

* Feeling unhappy and that no matter how much I do I will never look good with my partner.

All this leads to frustration and sometimes love-hate situation towards their partner, thus creating lawsuits between the two where they hurt each other a lot as a couple, moreover , one who constantly criticizes and scolds may reflect that he is suffering from problems such as:

*controlling personality, being toxic

* Play the role of father or mother to your partner

* Accumulated, painful anger from childhood or adolescence that has not been overcome

*immature personality or just plain bad attitude

* Being rude or having a negative relationship culture that was taught by the family environment at home where it developed.

yes ok Annoyance shows immaturity in both, one of them for scolding so much and the other for enduring it for years, The key to avoiding this is healthy communication between the two of you, letting the person know how they make you feel and suggesting that they put themselves in your place. Managing these negative behaviors in a mature and peaceful manner leads to peace and a good atmosphere in the relationship.

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